Today I'm sitting in a hospital room. A small grey and blue and white room with specks all over the walls and floors. We've been sitting in this room for at least 4 hours now waiting. Waiting on the inevitable and the unknown. My husband is having surgery today. Well I say today. It's 5:37 pm as I type this. Hopefully it's still 'today' by the time they take him back. The surgery isn't life threatening. At least it's not supposed to be. But it does have the power to restore his vision in one of his eyes. Sight is something that we can so easily take for granted. I've never worn glasses. My eyes have always just worked. So I think it's something that I very easily overlook. But today, we're not taking anything for granted. Vision, smell, touch, hearing. All of it. We're praying for God's protection over him as they operate. We're praying for wisdom and steady hands for the Doctor. We're praying for a good recovery and that the original problem (pars planitis for those who care to know) doesn't return. Because even if all goes very well in the surgery, there's always the possibility that all of this will happen again. It's kind of scary to think through, my husband losing his vision. It's most certainly not something that I ever expected. And my husband and I have joked... every year we make all these big plans for the year of goals we want to accomplish: physical, spiritual, financial. You know the drill. New Year's Resolutions. And it seems like every year we just get hammered in January and this year it seems to have happened again. If I didn't know that God loved me, I'd think he was laughing at me as he moved the chess pieces of our lives in exactly the opposite direction we'd choose. But I know that's not how my holy, loving God works. No my God works like this:
But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved—and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.
(Ephesians 2:4-10 ESV)
My God is full of love. Love that is rich in mercy and great love that has made me alive with Christ so that we can do the good that God has prepared for us. This is true for me. This is true for my husband. This is true for every person who has been redeemed. Our God is overflowing with love and he lavishes it on us in the person of Jesus Christ. So my husband and I sit in this grey and blue speckled hospital room and we trust that our good, loving God is not slamming us down laughing every January. But that instead in love, he is preparing us for the good works that He has for us whether my husband can see or not.